Well every week can't be Mardi Gras now, can it? Things are plugging along in our neck of the woods with most days and nights being none too blog-worthy. Garrett has been working at Peet's Coffee & Tea (where we met! awww!) so his schedule has been very part time and very flexible which has been awesome. I'm still loving having him around the house more and just the general calm we've got going on with only one of us running around like a chicken with their head cut off trying to balance everything. (Um, guilty.)
I've been doing a few things I'm proud of, but again, they aren't really headline making: I've been going to the gym, like um, every night and just pushing myself like crazy. And I love it. I love when I am in a routine like this because working out feels so damn good. I never EVER leave the gym and regret working out, it's just the getting there that is a real mind game sometimes -- prioritizing fitness is hard, yo! It's been very easy the past few weeks because we haven't had a lot of things going on in the evenings so it's been no thing to pop over the gym and work out. As I look to next week's calendar with multiple mid week social events and weekend parties, I feel a little anxious. I'm just going to keep reminding myself what my priorities are, try and make good decisions, and basically cross my fingers and hope it all works out! Maybe I'll even plan some early morning workouts, who knows -- let's get crazy! :)
Anyway, the other super exciting thing going on (#sarcasm) is that I am studying for a test for an Insurance Designation I am getting for work, and the 300 page book that is all! about! insurance! is about as interesting and you can imagine. For a textbook it's not so bad, but the subject matter is a bit, um...technical? So it is taking me a while to get through. Not to mention I procrastinated like an ass, so even I've had the book for a month you know I am cramming, college-style, to get all the reading done because the test is TOMORROW. Nice. But I'm still proud of myself because it is easy to get into a slump at work and just show up so I am happy that I'm taking my time and investing in my own learning at work.
So with all the aforementioned excitement, this week pretty much looks like this:
*Wake up at 5
*Read INS book
*Do a few things around the house
*Shower
*Work/Email/Work/Read the Internet/Work
*Gym
*Cook Dinner
*Shower
*Read
*Maybe squeeze in some bad reality tv and a conversation with my sweetie
*Sleep
Lather, Rinse, Repeat.
And every once in a while there is a thrilling new event like Tuesday when I got to take my car into the shop (Crimony with the A/C problems -- the house! the car! -- it may just be a sweaty summer, yet). Or then there was yesterday when the spider guy came to our house and sprayed for bugs -- which sidenote, is wonderful but also disgusting. You see when those bugs die, they do not properly dispose of themselves, they just lay out in your patio/yards/garage DEAD until YOU dispose of them. Um...ICK! File that under Things I did not contemplate when planning The Great Bug Extinction of 2010. But anyway, bugs! Dead! I'm happy! (Well, for now.)
In the end, life is good even though it is not going to win any awards for Extreme Entertainment! My life is so boring it is like this season of The Hills, but with a less glamorous wardrobe. Cross your fingers I pass my test tomorrow so I can do some true celebrating and then maybe at least have a good lamp shade/table dancing story for you!
June 03, 2010
May 26, 2010
Rant*
Not that I need this blog to be all rainbows, puppy dogs, and unicorn farts but somedays I don't blog because the only thing going through my mind when I go to post are long lists of Things That Are Pissing Me Off. I really hate posting back to back ranty-everything-sucks-posts but dude, is Mercury in retrograde or something, because that is just going to have to be the situation. Today is definitely a Vent About Shitty Things In List Form type of day and that list includes, most notably:
*Everyone on the road. OMG, why is everyone on the road an asshole?
*The Weather -- because it's almost June. And it's raining outside. WTF? (But I guess I should see this as a secret blessing seeing as we have made no progress on Operation: Replace the House AC for 900 Million Dollars).
*The fact that everytime I have had the radio on today they are playing that dumb ad about American Idol saying - Tonight we will finally answer the question of (insert Ryan Seacrest's annoying voice) "The next American Idol is..." Because people, this is not a question. It is an unfinished statement. A fragment. A brief pause for philosophical pondering. But! IT IS NOT, in fact, A QUESTION.
*The fact that my coworker is out for the next week and I am taking all of her calls and OMG the phone with Not. Stop. Ringing. (Though I'm glad she's on vacay, because she deserves it!) Which makes it inordinately hard to get anything done at work.
*That very obvious truth that men and women approach communication so differently.
*Oh, and a just a post script piece of advice regarding that last one -- asking a woman if she is going to start her period is a wonderful way to get a swift kick in the nuts. Not so much a vent, but more a warning.
*That fact that the generic rattling going on in my car and the unidentifiable pain in my tooth will both be certainly be fixable; HOWEVER, you and I both know that these types of problems are never cheap.
*That everything costs money.
*And Isn't it weird how a savings account takes ages to grow, yet mere seconds to deplete.
*Which reminds me, after weeks of working out religiously and noticing the difference in my clothes I smugly bought a few new pairs of pants in a smaller size, THAT ARE NOW ALL OF A SUDDEN TIGHT.
*Excuse me while I reach for an ice cream sandwich to dull that pain.
*That every book I have picked up in the last month has been a total bust. (Except the one I'm reading now. Hopefully I'm not jinxing myself.)
*Unidentifiable lights that come on in your car. Mystery pictures that appear to imply your brake lights are out when they are not? WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME, MYSTERY SYMBOL?
Seriously, tomorrow I am going to start my day by doing this.
Anything you would like to rant about? C'mon, I feel better already!
*Idea borrowed from the great Angella
*Everyone on the road. OMG, why is everyone on the road an asshole?
*The Weather -- because it's almost June. And it's raining outside. WTF? (But I guess I should see this as a secret blessing seeing as we have made no progress on Operation: Replace the House AC for 900 Million Dollars).
*The fact that everytime I have had the radio on today they are playing that dumb ad about American Idol saying - Tonight we will finally answer the question of (insert Ryan Seacrest's annoying voice) "The next American Idol is..." Because people, this is not a question. It is an unfinished statement. A fragment. A brief pause for philosophical pondering. But! IT IS NOT, in fact, A QUESTION.
*The fact that my coworker is out for the next week and I am taking all of her calls and OMG the phone with Not. Stop. Ringing. (Though I'm glad she's on vacay, because she deserves it!) Which makes it inordinately hard to get anything done at work.
*That very obvious truth that men and women approach communication so differently.
*Oh, and a just a post script piece of advice regarding that last one -- asking a woman if she is going to start her period is a wonderful way to get a swift kick in the nuts. Not so much a vent, but more a warning.
*That fact that the generic rattling going on in my car and the unidentifiable pain in my tooth will both be certainly be fixable; HOWEVER, you and I both know that these types of problems are never cheap.
*That everything costs money.
*And Isn't it weird how a savings account takes ages to grow, yet mere seconds to deplete.
*Which reminds me, after weeks of working out religiously and noticing the difference in my clothes I smugly bought a few new pairs of pants in a smaller size, THAT ARE NOW ALL OF A SUDDEN TIGHT.
*Excuse me while I reach for an ice cream sandwich to dull that pain.
*That every book I have picked up in the last month has been a total bust. (Except the one I'm reading now. Hopefully I'm not jinxing myself.)
*Unidentifiable lights that come on in your car. Mystery pictures that appear to imply your brake lights are out when they are not? WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME, MYSTERY SYMBOL?
Seriously, tomorrow I am going to start my day by doing this.
Anything you would like to rant about? C'mon, I feel better already!
*Idea borrowed from the great Angella
May 21, 2010
Focusing on the Positive
So I played hooky at work yesterday because the Air Conditioner in our house isn't working so I had a guy come out to look at it and figure out what the heck was wrong with it. The short answer is: everything. The long answer is: We just need to get a new one. But the AC guy was nice enough to tell me that he has seen new systems as cheap as $6,000.
Blink. Blink. blinkblinkblinkblink.
Well golly gee, that's good to hear. They're cheap! OMGKILLMENOW.
So yeah, not so much goodness happening around these parts this week. We're going to go ahead and add the A/C project to our To-Do list of *life projects that are totally going to be cheap to do I'm sure*, which also includes:
-Landscape Front and Back Yard
-Fix Air Conditioner in my car before Sacramento gets sucky and sweltering
-Fix CV Boot issue in Garrett's car
-Paint Interior House..oh, and my personal favorite
-Go to the dentist to get to the bottom of that tooth of mine that is hurting
So Yeah....since I'm trying to stay positive here, I'm choosing instead to focus on this to-do list, which I like to call
Shit I'm Prioritizing This Weekend:
*Making this Warm Quinoa Salad
*Reading this book.
Real Quick, can somebody tell real quick when I turned into a giant hippy?
Meh. Whatever.
*Watch copious amounts of Criminal Minds.
I'm going through an obsession with that show, pretty much as I did with every single one of the CSI franchises (except NY, I just can't get into CSI:NY), where I can watch like 5 episodes back to back and not bat an eyelash. What can I tell you? I can be a master at the art of time-suckage when I want to be.
This weekend, will be great damnit! And at least it won't be hot, so I've got that going for me with no Air Conditioning...hahahahahahahahaSOB.
Hope you are doing something great, friend!
Blink. Blink. blinkblinkblinkblink.
Well golly gee, that's good to hear. They're cheap! OMGKILLMENOW.
So yeah, not so much goodness happening around these parts this week. We're going to go ahead and add the A/C project to our To-Do list of *life projects that are totally going to be cheap to do I'm sure*, which also includes:
-Landscape Front and Back Yard
-Fix Air Conditioner in my car before Sacramento gets sucky and sweltering
-Fix CV Boot issue in Garrett's car
-Paint Interior House..oh, and my personal favorite
-Go to the dentist to get to the bottom of that tooth of mine that is hurting
So Yeah....since I'm trying to stay positive here, I'm choosing instead to focus on this to-do list, which I like to call
Shit I'm Prioritizing This Weekend:
*Making this Warm Quinoa Salad
*Reading this book.
Real Quick, can somebody tell real quick when I turned into a giant hippy?
Meh. Whatever.
*Watch copious amounts of Criminal Minds.
I'm going through an obsession with that show, pretty much as I did with every single one of the CSI franchises (except NY, I just can't get into CSI:NY), where I can watch like 5 episodes back to back and not bat an eyelash. What can I tell you? I can be a master at the art of time-suckage when I want to be.
This weekend, will be great damnit! And at least it won't be hot, so I've got that going for me with no Air Conditioning...hahahahahahahahaSOB.
Hope you are doing something great, friend!
May 20, 2010
Beauty Pressure
A while back, one of my favorite bloggy peeps Amy over at Just a Titch invited me to a fun and girly yoga party that was sponsored by Dove. I love Dove products, truly, so obviously I was excited. Pretty much everything they make smells delicious and works wonderfully, and back in the day even before they had fancy scented stuff, their plain old white soap was the only bar soap I had ever used that didn't leave me feeling like I was covered in soap scum. Needless to say, I'm a fan and was stoked to be invited! Although the day of the party I felt awful and was probably the worst yoga student EVER, it was a very nice event and really stuck in my mind what a great company Dove is to sponsor events like that for local bloggers.
And so today, when I ran across this, I just had to post it because really, how can you not love Dove when they spend Marketing Money on things like this?
And so today, when I ran across this, I just had to post it because really, how can you not love Dove when they spend Marketing Money on things like this?
May 18, 2010
Some Things You Should Know About Me
Since we’re all friends here I thought today might be a nice time to tell you about a brush with the law I had a little over a decade ago. You see, I consider myself a pretty law abiding citizen these days. I mean, it’s The Law, right? So I try to respect it. I mean this hands-free headset cell phone thing does irritate me and even though Oprah is all over it, I’m still finding it a very bitter pill to swallow, but I respect it. I drive in the mostly no phone zone, and I'm definitely trying, but that is a product of age, I think. Because I'm not sure my 20 year old self was quite so level headed about The Law.
Once during the LA Years I got pulled over for not having a front license plate and subsequently was given a fix it ticket. But “fixing it” was going to cost me somewhere in the realm of $50 and I was sort of pissed at this. That was money that I could have been spending on important things like booze and tacos and stuff. I certainly wasn’t going to spend it on some mounting thingamajig so that I could affix my license plate to it. I didn’t even know where that plate was anyhow, it had been like that since I bought the damn car so why don’t you go give the dealership a fix it ticket, Officer Shut-Your-Face, mmmkay? Also – I was single. And I wasn’t really skilled at the whole Art of Affixing Things. I mean, even if I was willing to spend $50 at an Auto Parts Store (which I wasn’t) what the hell would I do with it when I got home? I was living with a diva and a gay man, there were not a lot of handy people in that house, you know?
So I ignored it, obviously. It seemed like a reasonable thing to do at the time. I had other things to think about and I’ll tell you what, none of those things were license plates. I got a follow up letter about it, and I think I may have possibly put it in my stack of papers to look at later. Maybe it got thrown away, I don’t really know, organization at that time was also not my strong suit. And I think another letter or two may have come in the mail but I didn’t really pay attention that stuff – you know booze, tacos, whatnot – remember? These things were important! Not some silly letter. But then one day a letter came that I did end up paying attention to because it mentioned things like COURT DATES and WARRANTS FOR MY ARREST.
And holy shitballs, that was pretty important. So I went to court.
The judge was actually pretty nice. I was honest (you know, without mentioning the booze or the tacos) and I think he probably thought I was a giant spoiled douchebag that needed to learn a new filing system or something (and I probably was) but he let me go if I was willing to pay the fine and, of course, actually fix it. You are probably not surprised at this point to find out that I drove to court that day (months later!) in a car that STILL didn’t have a front license plate. Man, some days I weep for my former self. Anyway, all was well and good until I got to the little window outside of the courtroom and found out this "little" fine that I would have to pay was something to the tune of $700. Um…do you know how many tacos that can buy?
So -- lesson learned the hard way and all that. I wish I could say that is the only lesson I had to learn the hard way, but alas your 20s last an entire decade, don’t they? Among other things, this whole incident has now given me an irrational fear of the fix-it ticket and its potentially unforeseen financial consequences. You could probably argue that a normal person would have seen those financial consequences coming and so I have nothing to worry about, but I admitted that the fear was irrational, okay? Let me be. Anyway I’ve obviously straightened things out over the last decade and things like that are a distant and laughable memory, but I still have The Fear. And for the last few years I’ve been driving Garrett’s second car and wouldn’t you know it, it’s an old car that was a hand me down from his grandma and when we got it, it didn’t have a front license plate.
“We need to fix that STAT!” I told him the day we got the car, and many days since. (See, at least I learn from my mistakes.) But of course he insisted that I’m being insanely paranoid since he has driven a car for 13 years without a front license plate (apparently they aesthetically offensive to some, who knew?) and never been pulled over, and of course he always reminds me this is Sacramento and not Los Angeles, and Gee Whiz Holly…don’t get yourself all worked up and crazy about it, we will get around to fixing it some point, and ….WELL GEE WHIZ BUCKO, GUESS WHO GOT A CRAZY FIX IT TICKET FOR THEIR EFFING CAR AND THEIR LACK OF AN EFFING FRONG LICENSE PLATE THIS AFTERNOON?
I’ll give you one guess cuz I'm nice like that.
I’m so ri-DONK-ulously irritated that I got the ticket because it totally could have been prevented, but also because – Hey Mr. CHP, aren’t there like REAL criminals you could be going after? The worst part of the whole thing though is that I had to sit, pulled over, looking like a criminal on the side of the road right in front of my super duper dream house and of course they came home while I was sitting there. Of course they did. And so did their neighbors actually. And you know at least one of them thinks I’m some sort of scoundrel now. I wanted to lean out the window shout “Garrett is the scoundrel! The scoundrel that wouldn't fix my license plate!” right as they pulled into their garage, but I didn’t. I just kept mum until the officer wrote out my ticket and then when he handed it over to me I said Thank you. THANK YOU! Gah, I hate myself for saying that. I’m not thankful, yet I still said thank you even though I had sat there for like 10 minutes in the car reminding myself over and over to make sure that I DIDN’T say thank you when he handed it over.
But the silver lining in all of that is that I’m secretly feeling a bit Smuggy McSmuggerson because GUESS WHO WAS TOTALLY RIGHT? Right. Right. Right. I am so Right. And totally NOT paranoid! BOO YAH! And if you haven't already guessed that I made a super-illegal-apologies-to-Oprah, “I Told You So” phone call to Garrett as soon as I pulled away from that curb and out of that CHP's eyesight, well then, you may not know me at all.
Once during the LA Years I got pulled over for not having a front license plate and subsequently was given a fix it ticket. But “fixing it” was going to cost me somewhere in the realm of $50 and I was sort of pissed at this. That was money that I could have been spending on important things like booze and tacos and stuff. I certainly wasn’t going to spend it on some mounting thingamajig so that I could affix my license plate to it. I didn’t even know where that plate was anyhow, it had been like that since I bought the damn car so why don’t you go give the dealership a fix it ticket, Officer Shut-Your-Face, mmmkay? Also – I was single. And I wasn’t really skilled at the whole Art of Affixing Things. I mean, even if I was willing to spend $50 at an Auto Parts Store (which I wasn’t) what the hell would I do with it when I got home? I was living with a diva and a gay man, there were not a lot of handy people in that house, you know?
So I ignored it, obviously. It seemed like a reasonable thing to do at the time. I had other things to think about and I’ll tell you what, none of those things were license plates. I got a follow up letter about it, and I think I may have possibly put it in my stack of papers to look at later. Maybe it got thrown away, I don’t really know, organization at that time was also not my strong suit. And I think another letter or two may have come in the mail but I didn’t really pay attention that stuff – you know booze, tacos, whatnot – remember? These things were important! Not some silly letter. But then one day a letter came that I did end up paying attention to because it mentioned things like COURT DATES and WARRANTS FOR MY ARREST.
And holy shitballs, that was pretty important. So I went to court.
The judge was actually pretty nice. I was honest (you know, without mentioning the booze or the tacos) and I think he probably thought I was a giant spoiled douchebag that needed to learn a new filing system or something (and I probably was) but he let me go if I was willing to pay the fine and, of course, actually fix it. You are probably not surprised at this point to find out that I drove to court that day (months later!) in a car that STILL didn’t have a front license plate. Man, some days I weep for my former self. Anyway, all was well and good until I got to the little window outside of the courtroom and found out this "little" fine that I would have to pay was something to the tune of $700. Um…do you know how many tacos that can buy?
So -- lesson learned the hard way and all that. I wish I could say that is the only lesson I had to learn the hard way, but alas your 20s last an entire decade, don’t they? Among other things, this whole incident has now given me an irrational fear of the fix-it ticket and its potentially unforeseen financial consequences. You could probably argue that a normal person would have seen those financial consequences coming and so I have nothing to worry about, but I admitted that the fear was irrational, okay? Let me be. Anyway I’ve obviously straightened things out over the last decade and things like that are a distant and laughable memory, but I still have The Fear. And for the last few years I’ve been driving Garrett’s second car and wouldn’t you know it, it’s an old car that was a hand me down from his grandma and when we got it, it didn’t have a front license plate.
“We need to fix that STAT!” I told him the day we got the car, and many days since. (See, at least I learn from my mistakes.) But of course he insisted that I’m being insanely paranoid since he has driven a car for 13 years without a front license plate (apparently they aesthetically offensive to some, who knew?) and never been pulled over, and of course he always reminds me this is Sacramento and not Los Angeles, and Gee Whiz Holly…don’t get yourself all worked up and crazy about it, we will get around to fixing it some point, and ….WELL GEE WHIZ BUCKO, GUESS WHO GOT A CRAZY FIX IT TICKET FOR THEIR EFFING CAR AND THEIR LACK OF AN EFFING FRONG LICENSE PLATE THIS AFTERNOON?
I’ll give you one guess cuz I'm nice like that.
I’m so ri-DONK-ulously irritated that I got the ticket because it totally could have been prevented, but also because – Hey Mr. CHP, aren’t there like REAL criminals you could be going after? The worst part of the whole thing though is that I had to sit, pulled over, looking like a criminal on the side of the road right in front of my super duper dream house and of course they came home while I was sitting there. Of course they did. And so did their neighbors actually. And you know at least one of them thinks I’m some sort of scoundrel now. I wanted to lean out the window shout “Garrett is the scoundrel! The scoundrel that wouldn't fix my license plate!” right as they pulled into their garage, but I didn’t. I just kept mum until the officer wrote out my ticket and then when he handed it over to me I said Thank you. THANK YOU! Gah, I hate myself for saying that. I’m not thankful, yet I still said thank you even though I had sat there for like 10 minutes in the car reminding myself over and over to make sure that I DIDN’T say thank you when he handed it over.
But the silver lining in all of that is that I’m secretly feeling a bit Smuggy McSmuggerson because GUESS WHO WAS TOTALLY RIGHT? Right. Right. Right. I am so Right. And totally NOT paranoid! BOO YAH! And if you haven't already guessed that I made a super-illegal-apologies-to-Oprah, “I Told You So” phone call to Garrett as soon as I pulled away from that curb and out of that CHP's eyesight, well then, you may not know me at all.
May 17, 2010
Tree of Life
I lived in the same house from the time I was very small until I was 17 years old. When it was my turn to move out of the house, my parents did as well and it was sort of this weird simultaneous transition. They say you can’t go home again, and the truth for me was, I couldn’t. Ever since that house I’ve lived in a number of different apartments and in many different places: college in San Luis Obispo and then Los Angeles just because (in Westwood right by UCLA, then in Mar Vista right by Marina del Rey). After that I headed up to Sacramento where I have lived Downtown, then in East Sacramento and now in the suburban outskirts of Carmichael (which trust me, are all very different living experiences). With each move I have become more efficient with that dance of systematically unpacking my stuff, setting up a brand new life, finding Target and the grocery store and the good gas stations, and then of course trying to make my house a home. But part of me was always still searching for something.
I’ve always had a bit of wanderlust. I’ve discussed that here before, I love to travel and when I do I rarely go for fancy hotels. I much prefer renting a house or a condo in my destination, and pretending – even if just for a weekend – that this is my home. It’s fun to play the part of a whole new life. I’ve always thought of myself as someone who was adaptable. I’ve always though I could pick and move anywhere at anytime. It’s something I know how to do, something I do well even – moving from place to place and always finding where I belong there.
I think I took for granted the stability of my home growing up, but I mean what can you expect? I was a kid and idyllic suburbia was all I knew. I longed for “bigger and better” things as I grew up – living in the city, or having a fun apartment downtown – whatever it was. But as I’ve gotten older, moved around, and lived in different places I have such a better appreciation for everything my parents did to make our house more than just this place we all slept. It was home. And of course even though I have had great living experiences in my 32 years -- lived in fun and quirky places, had some fantastic roommates (and some not so fantastic ones, too!) -- I still found myself in search of that feeling of home and often wondered what it would feel like as an adult.
Yesterday afternoon I fell asleep on the couch as I often do on a lazy Sunday afternoon. I took a catnap with the sun coming in the windows just a bit making the house that perfect temperature for snoozing. It was quiet and when I woke up Garrett was tip-toeing around the house cleaning things up in the kitchen.
“I’ve never seen you sleep more soundly than you do at this house.”
And it’s true (although truth be told regardless of chair, bed, or couch, I can be a champion sleeper in any locale.) But even more than that, I realized – I do sleep sounder here. I breathe deeper here. Moving in to this particular house with this particular boy has – at the risk of sounding a bit cheesy – been a bit of a homecoming. (Collective barfing can commence!) My favorite stuff and my favorite person are finally all in the same location. No more subconscious worrying about one or the other. No more shuttling back and forth on the weekends. No more buying groceries for one house just to end up having them spoil because you both are staying at the other house.
THIS, is home.
And you all, it is like this giant exhale for my soul.
And I know you are probably thinking to yourself – hey genius, it’s already been a year and you are just getting around to this epiphany now? And the answer to that is: kind of. What can I say; sometimes I’m slow on the uptake.
Lately I keep looking around the rooms of my house – our house – and seeing our intertwined lives in every single room. The things we’ve done together, the things we’ve chosen together, our shared tasks, and our shared goals. I’ve looked around at this house – well, at this life really – and seen roots. Which is exactly what I have always missed about my life with my parents in our little old house. This is the thing I have been looking for. This is the life I’ve been searching for. And I know that if you take this blog’s word for it, sometimes it is a small and mundane life -- who are we kidding, right? But even though it is a silly little life, you guys sometimes it is such a good life – and on days like yesterday I almost can’t believe my luck that I found it at all -- and can hardly believe that I get to watch it grow.
I’ve always had a bit of wanderlust. I’ve discussed that here before, I love to travel and when I do I rarely go for fancy hotels. I much prefer renting a house or a condo in my destination, and pretending – even if just for a weekend – that this is my home. It’s fun to play the part of a whole new life. I’ve always thought of myself as someone who was adaptable. I’ve always though I could pick and move anywhere at anytime. It’s something I know how to do, something I do well even – moving from place to place and always finding where I belong there.
I think I took for granted the stability of my home growing up, but I mean what can you expect? I was a kid and idyllic suburbia was all I knew. I longed for “bigger and better” things as I grew up – living in the city, or having a fun apartment downtown – whatever it was. But as I’ve gotten older, moved around, and lived in different places I have such a better appreciation for everything my parents did to make our house more than just this place we all slept. It was home. And of course even though I have had great living experiences in my 32 years -- lived in fun and quirky places, had some fantastic roommates (and some not so fantastic ones, too!) -- I still found myself in search of that feeling of home and often wondered what it would feel like as an adult.
Yesterday afternoon I fell asleep on the couch as I often do on a lazy Sunday afternoon. I took a catnap with the sun coming in the windows just a bit making the house that perfect temperature for snoozing. It was quiet and when I woke up Garrett was tip-toeing around the house cleaning things up in the kitchen.
“I’ve never seen you sleep more soundly than you do at this house.”
And it’s true (although truth be told regardless of chair, bed, or couch, I can be a champion sleeper in any locale.) But even more than that, I realized – I do sleep sounder here. I breathe deeper here. Moving in to this particular house with this particular boy has – at the risk of sounding a bit cheesy – been a bit of a homecoming. (Collective barfing can commence!) My favorite stuff and my favorite person are finally all in the same location. No more subconscious worrying about one or the other. No more shuttling back and forth on the weekends. No more buying groceries for one house just to end up having them spoil because you both are staying at the other house.
THIS, is home.
And you all, it is like this giant exhale for my soul.
And I know you are probably thinking to yourself – hey genius, it’s already been a year and you are just getting around to this epiphany now? And the answer to that is: kind of. What can I say; sometimes I’m slow on the uptake.
Lately I keep looking around the rooms of my house – our house – and seeing our intertwined lives in every single room. The things we’ve done together, the things we’ve chosen together, our shared tasks, and our shared goals. I’ve looked around at this house – well, at this life really – and seen roots. Which is exactly what I have always missed about my life with my parents in our little old house. This is the thing I have been looking for. This is the life I’ve been searching for. And I know that if you take this blog’s word for it, sometimes it is a small and mundane life -- who are we kidding, right? But even though it is a silly little life, you guys sometimes it is such a good life – and on days like yesterday I almost can’t believe my luck that I found it at all -- and can hardly believe that I get to watch it grow.
May 14, 2010
Time Flies When You're Having...Well, let's just say time flies, shall we?
The last couple of weeks...oh lordy, the last couple of weeks...can I tell you? They have been interesting. Lots of work-ish stuff going on, which of course keeps me from blogging. You know the feeling, all you want to talk about is what's happening with this GIANT UNBLOGGABLE TOPIC, and then all of a sudden time passes and you realize that this all consuming things has made you utterly boring and you have nary an interesting thing to say.
Yeah, that's been me as of late. Life is good though, no need to worry, I've just sort of been out of the loop. And I hate that.
So I just wanted to pop in and say hello for a minute and let you know that on Monday I will be back with some regularly scheduled programming. People are often curious why I write here since it's mostly just my personal drivel, and many can't quite understand how I could possibly call it a hobby...but seriously, when I don't write here -- I MISS IT!! (And of course I miss you guys, duh.)
I had a friend once who ran marathons and I just could not wrap my brain around marathons as a hobby because it sounds like torture but then she said, "I just feel gross if I'm not running regularly." And that, I understand. If I'm not writing, I just kind of feel gross. Life sort of isn't in balance.
So I hope you are all doing well, and are planning to have a nice relaxing weekend, and here's to next week, catching up, writing some stuff down, and nixing The Gross!
Toodles!
Yeah, that's been me as of late. Life is good though, no need to worry, I've just sort of been out of the loop. And I hate that.
So I just wanted to pop in and say hello for a minute and let you know that on Monday I will be back with some regularly scheduled programming. People are often curious why I write here since it's mostly just my personal drivel, and many can't quite understand how I could possibly call it a hobby...but seriously, when I don't write here -- I MISS IT!! (And of course I miss you guys, duh.)
I had a friend once who ran marathons and I just could not wrap my brain around marathons as a hobby because it sounds like torture but then she said, "I just feel gross if I'm not running regularly." And that, I understand. If I'm not writing, I just kind of feel gross. Life sort of isn't in balance.
So I hope you are all doing well, and are planning to have a nice relaxing weekend, and here's to next week, catching up, writing some stuff down, and nixing The Gross!
Toodles!
May 03, 2010
You Are Cordially Invited to Get the Party Started
I don't know how you all organize your recipes but I have four main systems. I have a D-Ring binder (Down with the O-Rings!) in the kitchen for recipes I have printed out from the internet (that is overflowing by the way -- what did I do before food blogs?), I have an accordion file of family recipes and random 3x5 cards, and then I bookmark recipes I want to try at delicious.com.
The fourth system is, well...less of a system and more of a compilation of random scraps of paper scribbled from god knows what source, newspaper clippings, and ingredients to try scrawled on the backs of envelopes. Cooking is sort of an organic process around here at times, what can I say. So before I start with the cooking talk today, can we pause so you can tell me: How do you organize your recipes? I'm dying to know, please please please enlighten me!
Whew! Thanks!
Ok so you probably saw this coming, but this following recipe is from that 4th Realm of Organization so unfortunately I can not politely tip my adaptation hat, but since I have made and tinkered with this recipe so many times I feel comfortable making its official name Holly's Refreshing YET DANGEROUS Sangria. And may I suggest serving it anywhere you want to get the party started.
Now I'll admit it starts off with some arbitrary ingredients:
Not pictured: a can of orange juice concentrate and sugar to taste. I forgot to include those because I had already had a glass of this when I took these pictures, so sue me.
After assembling this motley crew, the concocting couldn't be easier:
*Slice the following fruits in wedges and juice over a pitcher: 1 lemon, 1 lime, 1 orange. Throw them in the pitcher -- it looks pretty.
*Add one small can of chopped pineapple with its juices
*Add frozen berries to taste (any berries will work, pick your poison. I like to get crazy and add a lot.)
*Add 1-2 cans of ginger ale (you could probably use Sprite too, but I haven't tried it. If you do, let me know.)
*Add 1/2 cup of orange juice
*Add 1 bottle of red wine (my advice, go inexpensive -- but not too inexpensive)
*Add sugar to taste (I usually add a few tablespoons, if you like it sweeter, add more! This recipe is easy like that.)
****and here's where things get a little nutty*****
*Add 1/2 to 1 Cup of gin or vodka. (My suggestion, Bombay Sapphire, and 1 Cup, but that's just me, your raging alcoholic hostess. You can decide what's right for you.)
Stir, refrigerate until chilled, and enjoy with friends.
I have never had anyone not like this Sangria, in fact quite the opposite. I have received some pretty sloppy hugs and kisses over it, so my last warning to you is be careful who you serve it to.
Now drink up!
The fourth system is, well...less of a system and more of a compilation of random scraps of paper scribbled from god knows what source, newspaper clippings, and ingredients to try scrawled on the backs of envelopes. Cooking is sort of an organic process around here at times, what can I say. So before I start with the cooking talk today, can we pause so you can tell me: How do you organize your recipes? I'm dying to know, please please please enlighten me!
Whew! Thanks!
Ok so you probably saw this coming, but this following recipe is from that 4th Realm of Organization so unfortunately I can not politely tip my adaptation hat, but since I have made and tinkered with this recipe so many times I feel comfortable making its official name Holly's Refreshing YET DANGEROUS Sangria. And may I suggest serving it anywhere you want to get the party started.
Now I'll admit it starts off with some arbitrary ingredients:
Not pictured: a can of orange juice concentrate and sugar to taste. I forgot to include those because I had already had a glass of this when I took these pictures, so sue me.
After assembling this motley crew, the concocting couldn't be easier:
*Slice the following fruits in wedges and juice over a pitcher: 1 lemon, 1 lime, 1 orange. Throw them in the pitcher -- it looks pretty.
*Add one small can of chopped pineapple with its juices
*Add frozen berries to taste (any berries will work, pick your poison. I like to get crazy and add a lot.)
*Add 1-2 cans of ginger ale (you could probably use Sprite too, but I haven't tried it. If you do, let me know.)
*Add 1/2 cup of orange juice
*Add 1 bottle of red wine (my advice, go inexpensive -- but not too inexpensive)
*Add sugar to taste (I usually add a few tablespoons, if you like it sweeter, add more! This recipe is easy like that.)
****and here's where things get a little nutty*****
*Add 1/2 to 1 Cup of gin or vodka. (My suggestion, Bombay Sapphire, and 1 Cup, but that's just me, your raging alcoholic hostess. You can decide what's right for you.)
Stir, refrigerate until chilled, and enjoy with friends.
I have never had anyone not like this Sangria, in fact quite the opposite. I have received some pretty sloppy hugs and kisses over it, so my last warning to you is be careful who you serve it to.
Now drink up!
April 29, 2010
House Husbands, FTW!
So I'm just going to throw this out there -- I kind of love having a house husband and I highly recommend everyone get one. It's kind of life changing.
All sexist kidding aside though, it is absolutely ASTOUNDING how much less chaotic our lives our have been since Garrett stopped working two weeks ago. (You know, except for when I royally screwed things up.) But even when I was screwing things up -- I had support! And Garrett has kindly made himself available for whatever I need. And made my lunch (today was burgers and caramelized onions!) And ran errands I have been dreading, and oh my stars you all, it has seriously been so darn nice.
One of the things I have been trying to be especially conscious of during this transition is expressing my gratitude for all the things Garrett has been doing around the house. I was lucky growing up and my mom stayed home. I was spoiled, really. But I so clearly remember her often saying it was a thankless job and people definitely used to question what my mom did all day since she didn't work. (HA!) Boy did that used to burn her up because, as she would clarify -- it wasn't that she didn't work, it was that she didn't work outside the home. And I'll tell you if I learned one thing, I learned real quick that there was a difference between the two, and I best realize that staying home was a job!
And years later I love her to pieces for being so excellent at it!
So one of the consequences of my upbringing is that I'm very aware of the value of domestic tasks. So I have tried to really have gratitude each day that while I have been in the office, Garrett has been busting tail at home. And he has! I mean of course he has done some relaxing too. I think he has been through like 5 Audio books, but I know I've told you before that he likes to listen to those while he cleans, so you can bet our house looks spic and span because of it.
But he has done so many other things too -- things that languish on our "If we had but time and energy" to do list? I know you know this list. You have this list, I'm sure of it. Things like totally cleaning out and reorganizing our freezer (swoon!). Organizing the garage (ick!). Dealing with our yards (Achoo!). Doing our endless stack of dishes (since we don't have a dishwasher). Tackling the mass amounts of laundry that resulted from vacations, and guests, and life - OH MY! You see all of these things would probably still be on the list if he would have been at work too. We would probably be trying to figure out a way to split up those tasks so they could all get done and because of that it feels hugely decadent that I haven't done a load of laundry, or washed a dish in...well, weeks. And you guys, we don't even have kids! So my mind is seriously boggling over how to juggle being two working parents, plus life, plus (OMG!) kids. Hat tip to all of you who do that because the past few weeks have really underscored to me how much energy that really must take!
And seriously, speaking of energy, my mom had like crazy, freak energy when I was growing up! I mean she really Ran our household (and I'm sure at times it felt like a never ending hamster wheel). She taught me alot. And it's made me realize that the idea of keeping a house today is such a lost art! Where's Mad Men when I need it?!? And I'm don't mean to be Judgy McJudgerpants about it -- there's a million different reasons we don't all "keep house" and we don't need to get into here, and of course we all choose what's best for our own families so it's not my intention to offend anyone or make anyone feel bad as if there was a right way to live life. But I know for me, having these couple weeks with Garrett staying home have really highlighted the huge value in having a life without much chaos. It feels like a luxury. And now that I have seen what things could be like (insert dramatic voice here) I don't know how I will ever adjust if we go back to how it was!
But you know, it's been a learning experience. Whether, in the future, we are able to stay afloat with only one of us working, or whether we choose jobs that have more work from home flexibility (Dooce is on that, right?), or whether we both go back to work and end up juggling our multiple priorities as best we can, I know I will savor the imprint that this time in my life has made on me. And I hope to hold it close like a compass in the future when I'm trying to decide which direction to go.
All sexist kidding aside though, it is absolutely ASTOUNDING how much less chaotic our lives our have been since Garrett stopped working two weeks ago. (You know, except for when I royally screwed things up.) But even when I was screwing things up -- I had support! And Garrett has kindly made himself available for whatever I need. And made my lunch (today was burgers and caramelized onions!) And ran errands I have been dreading, and oh my stars you all, it has seriously been so darn nice.
One of the things I have been trying to be especially conscious of during this transition is expressing my gratitude for all the things Garrett has been doing around the house. I was lucky growing up and my mom stayed home. I was spoiled, really. But I so clearly remember her often saying it was a thankless job and people definitely used to question what my mom did all day since she didn't work. (HA!) Boy did that used to burn her up because, as she would clarify -- it wasn't that she didn't work, it was that she didn't work outside the home. And I'll tell you if I learned one thing, I learned real quick that there was a difference between the two, and I best realize that staying home was a job!
And years later I love her to pieces for being so excellent at it!
So one of the consequences of my upbringing is that I'm very aware of the value of domestic tasks. So I have tried to really have gratitude each day that while I have been in the office, Garrett has been busting tail at home. And he has! I mean of course he has done some relaxing too. I think he has been through like 5 Audio books, but I know I've told you before that he likes to listen to those while he cleans, so you can bet our house looks spic and span because of it.
But he has done so many other things too -- things that languish on our "If we had but time and energy" to do list? I know you know this list. You have this list, I'm sure of it. Things like totally cleaning out and reorganizing our freezer (swoon!). Organizing the garage (ick!). Dealing with our yards (Achoo!). Doing our endless stack of dishes (since we don't have a dishwasher). Tackling the mass amounts of laundry that resulted from vacations, and guests, and life - OH MY! You see all of these things would probably still be on the list if he would have been at work too. We would probably be trying to figure out a way to split up those tasks so they could all get done and because of that it feels hugely decadent that I haven't done a load of laundry, or washed a dish in...well, weeks. And you guys, we don't even have kids! So my mind is seriously boggling over how to juggle being two working parents, plus life, plus (OMG!) kids. Hat tip to all of you who do that because the past few weeks have really underscored to me how much energy that really must take!
And seriously, speaking of energy, my mom had like crazy, freak energy when I was growing up! I mean she really Ran our household (and I'm sure at times it felt like a never ending hamster wheel). She taught me alot. And it's made me realize that the idea of keeping a house today is such a lost art! Where's Mad Men when I need it?!? And I'm don't mean to be Judgy McJudgerpants about it -- there's a million different reasons we don't all "keep house" and we don't need to get into here, and of course we all choose what's best for our own families so it's not my intention to offend anyone or make anyone feel bad as if there was a right way to live life. But I know for me, having these couple weeks with Garrett staying home have really highlighted the huge value in having a life without much chaos. It feels like a luxury. And now that I have seen what things could be like (insert dramatic voice here) I don't know how I will ever adjust if we go back to how it was!
But you know, it's been a learning experience. Whether, in the future, we are able to stay afloat with only one of us working, or whether we choose jobs that have more work from home flexibility (Dooce is on that, right?), or whether we both go back to work and end up juggling our multiple priorities as best we can, I know I will savor the imprint that this time in my life has made on me. And I hope to hold it close like a compass in the future when I'm trying to decide which direction to go.
April 28, 2010
Things, Life, Whatnot...
So most of the time if people find out that I have a blog they scrunch up their nose and ask me -- What on Earth do I write about on a blog? And I usually answer one of two ways:
1. God only knows.
2. Reading, Cooking, and Life.
So in the spirit of Number Two, (Did the 12 year old boy inside of you just laugh a little? Ok good then you should stick around) here are a few updates with respect to those topics.
READING
Currently Reading: The Gate at the Stairs by Lorrie Moore
I’m about 2/3 through this and I really like this so far even though a good amount of the characters are annoying to me. A testament to Moore’s writing skills? Probably. There is one part of the book where someone is described as being the annoying type of person who never laughs at things but instead just says “Oh that’s funny.” And as soon as I read that I just thought I TOTALLY KNOW THAT PERSON! And it is stuck in my head now. I love the description here. I kept hearing about this book and was sort of uninterested, but then Elizabeth’s Review sort of tipped the scale, so I reserved it at the library. So far, so good.
Recently Finished: Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer
So I should probably say that I recently finished a stint renting this book, not actually finished reading it. It was overdue at the library and even though it was so good – it wasn’t willing-to-pay-25 cents per day good, so I had to return it. I will probably put myself back at the bottom of the reservation list again though because Safran Foer has such a great voice and the book really felt like him thinking out loud and not at all like a preachy, vegetarian manifesto.
Recently Scrapped: Elegance of the Hedgehog by Muriel Barbery
I can not capitalize HATE enough to fully communicate my feelings about this book. I just Did. Not. Get. It. And almost 200 pages in I just had to tell myself that life is too short! But I hate doing that! What was this book about? How did it get so popular? Did you read it? UGH, all of that time I will just never get back.
Next up in the Queue Best Friends Forever by Jennifer Weiner
You guys, I just need a little fluff. I need a book that is the equivalent of a nice big stick of soft pink cotton candy washed down with an ice pink lemonade. I really hate the term chick-lit -- I prefer to call it hot-pink lit -- but I'm not gonna lie, I needs me some, STAT!
COOKING
So yes I have been doing A LOT of cooking lately. Man cooking relaxes me like nothing else does. I wish getting on the treadmill and running eleventy billion miles while eating only lettuce relaxed me like cooking does because then I can assure you my ass would have an entirely different shape, but something about coming home after work and chopping and saut̩ing and smelling and tasting is like the exact recipe for lowering my blood pressure after a long day at work. Speaking of long, do not go back and edit that last sentence - hello! run-on. But I love everything about cooking Рeven the meal planning and grocery list making and kitchen organizing aspect of it Рthough I still can't get myself to love the shopping part always.
Here are a few winners I’ve made lately:
Mediterranean Orzo Salad -- There are tons of great additions and modifications for this recipe and they are all fab!
Wheat berry Salad -- Crunchy, yummy staple to have in the fridge.
North African Meatballs -- This was so freaking delish people…and I had majorly low expectations and they were all EXCEEDED! In fact, I don’t even know why I ended up making this because I was so uninterested in the recipe, but boy am I glad I did!
Salted Brown Butter Crispy Treats -- I know this recipe has been around the internet so many times that you are probably rolling your eyes right now and thinking this is nothing new, but if you have yet to make these rice crispy treats, I am promising you THEY WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE. And I rarely make promises, yo. The browning of the butter and the salt really do make a difference – like in an eat the entire pan in one sitting kind of way. We are addicted STILL at our house, even though I made my first batch like months ago. It’s the Go-To dessert of choice.
LIFE
Ah, life.
Despite the rice crispy recipe I just posted, Garrett and I have really been making a conscious effort around here to eat better and exercise more. And we were kicking ass and taking names until a few weeks ago when there was all sorts of falling and wagons and such – you know the drill. Then we had talked ourselves into getting right back on it and then BAM! – Trip to Seattle – and I don’t need to remind you how that went, do I? So we are trying to get back to snacking on fruit and veggies instead of on whatever is within arm’s reach, trying to get back to the gym instead of spending our evenings in front of the tube, but man lately my life feels a bit like a bad reality TV pilot where six figures from Greek Mythology are picked to live in a house and work together in New Jersey T shirt shop to see what happens when people stop being nice and start getting real. And FOR REAL, I am totally Sisyphus and my ass is his god damn boulder although obviously with much less GTLing. (OH MY GOD, GTL has a wikipedia page. Kill me now.) Somebody call The Situation, because yo, I have got one going on in my house. So yeah, it doesn’t make for great blog fodder – but really everything is good.
Life, is good.
And in the end, I guess that’s what I try to write about as often as possible on this blog.
1. God only knows.
2. Reading, Cooking, and Life.
So in the spirit of Number Two, (Did the 12 year old boy inside of you just laugh a little? Ok good then you should stick around) here are a few updates with respect to those topics.
READING
Currently Reading: The Gate at the Stairs by Lorrie Moore
I’m about 2/3 through this and I really like this so far even though a good amount of the characters are annoying to me. A testament to Moore’s writing skills? Probably. There is one part of the book where someone is described as being the annoying type of person who never laughs at things but instead just says “Oh that’s funny.” And as soon as I read that I just thought I TOTALLY KNOW THAT PERSON! And it is stuck in my head now. I love the description here. I kept hearing about this book and was sort of uninterested, but then Elizabeth’s Review sort of tipped the scale, so I reserved it at the library. So far, so good.
Recently Finished: Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer
So I should probably say that I recently finished a stint renting this book, not actually finished reading it. It was overdue at the library and even though it was so good – it wasn’t willing-to-pay-25 cents per day good, so I had to return it. I will probably put myself back at the bottom of the reservation list again though because Safran Foer has such a great voice and the book really felt like him thinking out loud and not at all like a preachy, vegetarian manifesto.
Recently Scrapped: Elegance of the Hedgehog by Muriel Barbery
I can not capitalize HATE enough to fully communicate my feelings about this book. I just Did. Not. Get. It. And almost 200 pages in I just had to tell myself that life is too short! But I hate doing that! What was this book about? How did it get so popular? Did you read it? UGH, all of that time I will just never get back.
Next up in the Queue Best Friends Forever by Jennifer Weiner
You guys, I just need a little fluff. I need a book that is the equivalent of a nice big stick of soft pink cotton candy washed down with an ice pink lemonade. I really hate the term chick-lit -- I prefer to call it hot-pink lit -- but I'm not gonna lie, I needs me some, STAT!
COOKING
So yes I have been doing A LOT of cooking lately. Man cooking relaxes me like nothing else does. I wish getting on the treadmill and running eleventy billion miles while eating only lettuce relaxed me like cooking does because then I can assure you my ass would have an entirely different shape, but something about coming home after work and chopping and saut̩ing and smelling and tasting is like the exact recipe for lowering my blood pressure after a long day at work. Speaking of long, do not go back and edit that last sentence - hello! run-on. But I love everything about cooking Рeven the meal planning and grocery list making and kitchen organizing aspect of it Рthough I still can't get myself to love the shopping part always.
Here are a few winners I’ve made lately:
Mediterranean Orzo Salad -- There are tons of great additions and modifications for this recipe and they are all fab!
Wheat berry Salad -- Crunchy, yummy staple to have in the fridge.
North African Meatballs -- This was so freaking delish people…and I had majorly low expectations and they were all EXCEEDED! In fact, I don’t even know why I ended up making this because I was so uninterested in the recipe, but boy am I glad I did!
Salted Brown Butter Crispy Treats -- I know this recipe has been around the internet so many times that you are probably rolling your eyes right now and thinking this is nothing new, but if you have yet to make these rice crispy treats, I am promising you THEY WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE. And I rarely make promises, yo. The browning of the butter and the salt really do make a difference – like in an eat the entire pan in one sitting kind of way. We are addicted STILL at our house, even though I made my first batch like months ago. It’s the Go-To dessert of choice.
LIFE
Ah, life.
Despite the rice crispy recipe I just posted, Garrett and I have really been making a conscious effort around here to eat better and exercise more. And we were kicking ass and taking names until a few weeks ago when there was all sorts of falling and wagons and such – you know the drill. Then we had talked ourselves into getting right back on it and then BAM! – Trip to Seattle – and I don’t need to remind you how that went, do I? So we are trying to get back to snacking on fruit and veggies instead of on whatever is within arm’s reach, trying to get back to the gym instead of spending our evenings in front of the tube, but man lately my life feels a bit like a bad reality TV pilot where six figures from Greek Mythology are picked to live in a house and work together in New Jersey T shirt shop to see what happens when people stop being nice and start getting real. And FOR REAL, I am totally Sisyphus and my ass is his god damn boulder although obviously with much less GTLing. (OH MY GOD, GTL has a wikipedia page. Kill me now.) Somebody call The Situation, because yo, I have got one going on in my house. So yeah, it doesn’t make for great blog fodder – but really everything is good.
Life, is good.
And in the end, I guess that’s what I try to write about as often as possible on this blog.
April 27, 2010
How to Be Highly Ineffective
You guys! Ooooh you guys! I am usually so organized!
Really, organization is one of my favorite things. I have so many systems in my life and my house that for the most part my life runs fairly seamlessly. But sometimes I can be so dependant on those systems, that if I am doing something that doesn't involve a system, my brain totally wigs out! Like I basically fail at ad-libbing life!
I can be seriously forgetful sometimes and I will fully admit that it is not my best quality. I often forget things Garrett has said the day prior and entire conversations that we have. And it's not just conversations -- sometimes I get in the shower and start shampooing only to think to myself, "Did I already do this?" Granted, that's before coffee...but you get what I'm saying. Every once in a while though, Garrett will say to me with frustration (and rightfully so), "Holly, next time can you try harder to remember?" But hell if I have any idea on where to start with that one.
HOW DOES ONE TRY HARDER TO REMEMBER WHEN ONE IS ALREADY HAVING ISSUES WITH FORGETTING?
You guys, am I getting Alzheimer's in my 30s or am I just totally living unconsciously???
Anyway.
So usually I rationalize this behavior because it is just silly, tedious things. I run to the store for two things, and come home with twenty but forget the two items I actually ran down there for (though obvs for big shops I make lists -- organized by section, mind you!) or I do stupid things like decide to get gas on the way home after work and then promptly get into my car and drive home without stopping at any of the 10 gas stations I pass on the way and then pull into my driveway and see the little light go on. Ugh.
But I do have a calendar so I'm not a total heathen. If something is important I write it down in a few different places, and I am proud to say I rarely (if ever) completely blow it and miss something I have committed to. Really I don't. You are probably finding this hard to believe now that I have basically confessed to walking into a room and forgetting why I am there, but I promise you I'm not a total screw up. But the issue then becomes -- am I as prepared as I had meant to be for this thing I have (luckily) showed up for, and the answer, sadly, is not always in the way that I would like to be. And this flaw of mine is starting to take its toll.
Take today for example. Today I walked into work feeling like it was just any other day, only to open up my calendar and see that tonight is the night I have committed myself to helping cook dinner at St. John's Shelter. I've told you before that I do this, and I love it although it is a big production what with the grocery shopping, preparing, and serving. It takes some time is what I'm saying. But you guys, I almost forgot about this!!! And do you know what kind of anxiety it induces when you accidentally forget you are sort of HOSTING A DINNER FOR 120 PEOPLE IN A FEW HOURS AND YOU HAVEN'T EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT THE MENU? AND YOU ARE STUCK AT WORK.
(Just remembering that gave me heart palpitations.)
So, instead of having an enjoyable lunch break (which was desperately needed since the word rough does not even begin to describe my work day today) I called the Chef and St. John's for some inspiration, went to Costco and bought dinner supplies, drove them all the way back to my house, grabbed a change of clothes more suited to cooking and serving, cancelled on my gym class tonight that I was totally looking forward to, talked Garrett into meeting me after work with the perishables so I could skip out on work as late as possible and still get there by 4:30 (Yes, I have to take off work early to do this. No I had not asked my boss if that was ok. Yes I'm sure she was thrilled.) and then headed back to work.
Sigh. This was not relaxing.
And you know what the sad part is. I totally KNEW I was going to forget this when I signed up for it. I knew this was a hectic time for me, but volunteered anyway. I knew that I would write this on my home calendar and then promptly ignore it. And because I knew I was going to forget, as a last resort I put it on my work calendar, because Lotus Notes absolutely tells me where to go and what to do 8 hours a day 5 days a week, and I wish I were kidding about that. But seriously...thank god I did that! But that was a little too close for comfort. Like I really could have screwed this up and these people who were counting on me would have had a totally different experience. And I would have had no excuses.
Ugh. I just hate that feeling.
I almost really effed some stuff up today and I feel bad about it. I don't want to be someone who goes through life so unconscious that I make these kinds of screw-ups, but I also have a lot of stuff I want to do and find myself taking things on, and multi-tasking in a way that is not productive sometimes. But slowing down and "trying harder to remember" are just things that don't come naturally. But I need to get this under control. It's probably no surprise that while writing this I checked my email (because yes I compulsively multi-task even though I hate) but what is surprising is that I found a notice from my Library that a book I put on hold a while back is ready for pick up -- Steven Covey's The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. I actually reserved it for Garrett because I found it really helpful for me about a decade ago -- but I'm starting to think maybe it's me who needs to give it a second look. The Universe has a funny way of bringing us exactly what we need when we need it, I think. I'm just thinking it's just too bad it didn't show up with dinner for 120!
But I guess I probably deserve to be on my own for that one.
Really, organization is one of my favorite things. I have so many systems in my life and my house that for the most part my life runs fairly seamlessly. But sometimes I can be so dependant on those systems, that if I am doing something that doesn't involve a system, my brain totally wigs out! Like I basically fail at ad-libbing life!
I can be seriously forgetful sometimes and I will fully admit that it is not my best quality. I often forget things Garrett has said the day prior and entire conversations that we have. And it's not just conversations -- sometimes I get in the shower and start shampooing only to think to myself, "Did I already do this?" Granted, that's before coffee...but you get what I'm saying. Every once in a while though, Garrett will say to me with frustration (and rightfully so), "Holly, next time can you try harder to remember?" But hell if I have any idea on where to start with that one.
HOW DOES ONE TRY HARDER TO REMEMBER WHEN ONE IS ALREADY HAVING ISSUES WITH FORGETTING?
You guys, am I getting Alzheimer's in my 30s or am I just totally living unconsciously???
Anyway.
So usually I rationalize this behavior because it is just silly, tedious things. I run to the store for two things, and come home with twenty but forget the two items I actually ran down there for (though obvs for big shops I make lists -- organized by section, mind you!) or I do stupid things like decide to get gas on the way home after work and then promptly get into my car and drive home without stopping at any of the 10 gas stations I pass on the way and then pull into my driveway and see the little light go on. Ugh.
But I do have a calendar so I'm not a total heathen. If something is important I write it down in a few different places, and I am proud to say I rarely (if ever) completely blow it and miss something I have committed to. Really I don't. You are probably finding this hard to believe now that I have basically confessed to walking into a room and forgetting why I am there, but I promise you I'm not a total screw up. But the issue then becomes -- am I as prepared as I had meant to be for this thing I have (luckily) showed up for, and the answer, sadly, is not always in the way that I would like to be. And this flaw of mine is starting to take its toll.
Take today for example. Today I walked into work feeling like it was just any other day, only to open up my calendar and see that tonight is the night I have committed myself to helping cook dinner at St. John's Shelter. I've told you before that I do this, and I love it although it is a big production what with the grocery shopping, preparing, and serving. It takes some time is what I'm saying. But you guys, I almost forgot about this!!! And do you know what kind of anxiety it induces when you accidentally forget you are sort of HOSTING A DINNER FOR 120 PEOPLE IN A FEW HOURS AND YOU HAVEN'T EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT THE MENU? AND YOU ARE STUCK AT WORK.
(Just remembering that gave me heart palpitations.)
So, instead of having an enjoyable lunch break (which was desperately needed since the word rough does not even begin to describe my work day today) I called the Chef and St. John's for some inspiration, went to Costco and bought dinner supplies, drove them all the way back to my house, grabbed a change of clothes more suited to cooking and serving, cancelled on my gym class tonight that I was totally looking forward to, talked Garrett into meeting me after work with the perishables so I could skip out on work as late as possible and still get there by 4:30 (Yes, I have to take off work early to do this. No I had not asked my boss if that was ok. Yes I'm sure she was thrilled.) and then headed back to work.
Sigh. This was not relaxing.
And you know what the sad part is. I totally KNEW I was going to forget this when I signed up for it. I knew this was a hectic time for me, but volunteered anyway. I knew that I would write this on my home calendar and then promptly ignore it. And because I knew I was going to forget, as a last resort I put it on my work calendar, because Lotus Notes absolutely tells me where to go and what to do 8 hours a day 5 days a week, and I wish I were kidding about that. But seriously...thank god I did that! But that was a little too close for comfort. Like I really could have screwed this up and these people who were counting on me would have had a totally different experience. And I would have had no excuses.
Ugh. I just hate that feeling.
I almost really effed some stuff up today and I feel bad about it. I don't want to be someone who goes through life so unconscious that I make these kinds of screw-ups, but I also have a lot of stuff I want to do and find myself taking things on, and multi-tasking in a way that is not productive sometimes. But slowing down and "trying harder to remember" are just things that don't come naturally. But I need to get this under control. It's probably no surprise that while writing this I checked my email (because yes I compulsively multi-task even though I hate) but what is surprising is that I found a notice from my Library that a book I put on hold a while back is ready for pick up -- Steven Covey's The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. I actually reserved it for Garrett because I found it really helpful for me about a decade ago -- but I'm starting to think maybe it's me who needs to give it a second look. The Universe has a funny way of bringing us exactly what we need when we need it, I think. I'm just thinking it's just too bad it didn't show up with dinner for 120!
But I guess I probably deserve to be on my own for that one.
April 23, 2010
Weekend To Do List
I think that my 21 year old self would roll her eyes at this list, but the 31 year old me feels happy as a clam that these are the items I get to check off my list. (Yes, I do make lists for my leisure time. Are you surprised by this? I didn't think so.)
The weather looks to be bright and beautiful and with family in town I thought it might be fun to do a little barbecue action. Zesty chicken, corn salad with fresh avocados and maybe some grilled veggies. I may even make some sangria since I have a signature recipe that has laid dormant for almost a year now!
The magazines are because I got a little overzealous in the airport last week, and the banana cream pie is because the recipe has been calling to me ever since I read it in last month's Everyday with Rachael Ray and this weekend I may finally have time to bake. I'm not the world's best baker but I like to try, so we'll see how it turns out. I have a few chores here and there, but for the most part this weekend is going to be for connecting and recharging.
Happy Friday, folks!
What's on YOUR weekend To Do List?
April 21, 2010
How We Ate Our Way Through Seattle, and other sordid details...
So I guess I should probably tell you about Seattle, eh?
(That's 4 days of Canadian influence right there for you.)
Well for starters -- the light in that town is beautiful. Well, actually everything is beautiful. Yards full of weeds seem more beautiful when that purple hazed light shines all over everything dewy. It was amazing, and there were times when I looked over at Garrett and said, "Am I really seeing this?" and truly meant every bewildered word.
We ran the gamut of weather while we were there -- sunny and cool, damp and dewy, sunny and warm, and then also - my personal favorite - Sky Unfurling Wrath. That felt the most stereotypical, but I hear it's not always like that.
But do you know what the weird thing was? I didn't see a single umbrella the entire time we were there. Weird, right? Seattle peeps -- how do you stay dry with no umbrellas? It's a mystery.
Anyway, when we arrived on Friday we headed over to Lunchbox Laboratory in Ballard for some burgers and let me just tell you, they are not messing around. We ate part of this for lunch and then the leftovers for dinner since it was that epic and huge!
Of course 2 meals from one restaurant threw off my already overflowing spreadsheet of restaurants to visit, so I have to acknowledge that we failed miserably at getting through 47 restaurants in 4 days, but fret not we gave it our best effort at eating our way through town just as promised.
Saturday we hit up Pike Place - Crab Sandwiches, Mac and Cheese, Seared Scallop Chowder, Donuts - OH MY! - (More like Oh Mylanta! ay yay yay.)
And then for some reason (food coma, perhaps?) we ended up back at home watching a huge marathon of Man vs. Wild on the Discovery Channel. I am usually firmly against sitting and staring at the television when I'm on vacation, but our condo was so cute (and well, really, so is Bear Grylls) so I just kind of went with it. We stayed in and explored Capitol Hill that night (which is so cute, I'm kind of in love!) and had dinner at a local Pizza place which was just perfect.
On Sunday we decided to take it easy. After sleeping late, we met Maggie and Phillip for Dim Sum in the International District -- and as someone who has never had a Dim Sum experience before, I will DEFINITELY be partaking again! Man there was just so! much! stuff! I wish I could have shut my pie-hole for just a second and sampled every single thing, but as it turns out I was being kind of a blabbermouth so I only kind of know what I like for next time. I'm so game to experiment though -- it was scrumptious! Also, can I tell you how nice it is to see a familiar face? After a few days of planning and scheming and executing, it was so nice to just sit down and chit chat with great people and relax for a minute! I'm soooo incredibly glad we got to see them.
Afterward (totally stuffed!) we hopped on the ferry over to Bainbridge Island (ok we might have had some Ice Cream while we there). It was a beautiful day and the sun was out and if you can believe it I got a crazy sunburn!
When it came time to head home both Garrett and I were sad to say goodbye. We had a great time, saw beautiful sights, met up with fun friends, and stayed in an adorable condo in a cute neighborhood. I really couldn't have asked for a better vacation! But with that same zeal, I also couldn't decline those peanuts on the flight home quick enough! It's nice to be back home and back to eating like a normal person, but Seattle definitely left a great impression.
(That's 4 days of Canadian influence right there for you.)
Well for starters -- the light in that town is beautiful. Well, actually everything is beautiful. Yards full of weeds seem more beautiful when that purple hazed light shines all over everything dewy. It was amazing, and there were times when I looked over at Garrett and said, "Am I really seeing this?" and truly meant every bewildered word.
We ran the gamut of weather while we were there -- sunny and cool, damp and dewy, sunny and warm, and then also - my personal favorite - Sky Unfurling Wrath. That felt the most stereotypical, but I hear it's not always like that.
But do you know what the weird thing was? I didn't see a single umbrella the entire time we were there. Weird, right? Seattle peeps -- how do you stay dry with no umbrellas? It's a mystery.
Anyway, when we arrived on Friday we headed over to Lunchbox Laboratory in Ballard for some burgers and let me just tell you, they are not messing around. We ate part of this for lunch and then the leftovers for dinner since it was that epic and huge!
Of course 2 meals from one restaurant threw off my already overflowing spreadsheet of restaurants to visit, so I have to acknowledge that we failed miserably at getting through 47 restaurants in 4 days, but fret not we gave it our best effort at eating our way through town just as promised.
Saturday we hit up Pike Place - Crab Sandwiches, Mac and Cheese, Seared Scallop Chowder, Donuts - OH MY! - (More like Oh Mylanta! ay yay yay.)
And then for some reason (food coma, perhaps?) we ended up back at home watching a huge marathon of Man vs. Wild on the Discovery Channel. I am usually firmly against sitting and staring at the television when I'm on vacation, but our condo was so cute (and well, really, so is Bear Grylls) so I just kind of went with it. We stayed in and explored Capitol Hill that night (which is so cute, I'm kind of in love!) and had dinner at a local Pizza place which was just perfect.
On Sunday we decided to take it easy. After sleeping late, we met Maggie and Phillip for Dim Sum in the International District -- and as someone who has never had a Dim Sum experience before, I will DEFINITELY be partaking again! Man there was just so! much! stuff! I wish I could have shut my pie-hole for just a second and sampled every single thing, but as it turns out I was being kind of a blabbermouth so I only kind of know what I like for next time. I'm so game to experiment though -- it was scrumptious! Also, can I tell you how nice it is to see a familiar face? After a few days of planning and scheming and executing, it was so nice to just sit down and chit chat with great people and relax for a minute! I'm soooo incredibly glad we got to see them.
Afterward (totally stuffed!) we hopped on the ferry over to Bainbridge Island (ok we might have had some Ice Cream while we there). It was a beautiful day and the sun was out and if you can believe it I got a crazy sunburn!
We spent another evening in Capitol Hill -- this time having a simple dinner at Broadway Grill. It was a GORGEOUS night and their patio had been calling to me pretty much since the first night we arrived so we finally sat down and enjoyed some stiff cocktails and grub. A walk over to Cal Anderson Park afterward was just what the doctor ordered and we (and the rest of the neighborhood) continued to enjoy the unseasonably warm weather.
Monday came a bit too quick and it was time to hit the road, but not before seeing and lunching with Jessica, who I used to work with. Another familiar face was fabulous and she took Garrett and I to have basically the best meatball sliders I've ever had in my life at Palomino. Hands down.
When it came time to head home both Garrett and I were sad to say goodbye. We had a great time, saw beautiful sights, met up with fun friends, and stayed in an adorable condo in a cute neighborhood. I really couldn't have asked for a better vacation! But with that same zeal, I also couldn't decline those peanuts on the flight home quick enough! It's nice to be back home and back to eating like a normal person, but Seattle definitely left a great impression.
If you're interested, the rest of our pics are over here.
April 15, 2010
Following His Bliss
Well it appears there are all sorts of things going on today...
Today I wrote a check to the State of California. Joy.
*I sure hope they spend it well but I'm not going to hold my breath. grumblegrumblegrumble
Today is the one year anniversary of Garrett and me shacking up.
*I know what you are thinking -- Tax Day?Really? Obvs, we know how to infuse the romance up in here -- we're bringing tax day sexy back. Justin Timberlake told me so.
And also Today -- Garrett quit his job.
*Eek! Typing that was exhilarating and scary all at the same time.
It's a new chapter, folks.
I mentioned back in September that Garrett would be losing his job sometime in the near future. His department was being centralized to our company's Denver office and his job was going with it. Things changed rapidly in those next few months and all of a sudden the job he signed up for was looking very different from the job he was doing 5 days per week. Honestly, I want to tell you all the emotions I have about what happened with this job and what I think about the direction his department is going (trust me I could write a novel), but you will have to forgive me for staying mum because as you may or may not remember, Garrett and I (up until today) worked for the same company. You can probably read between the lines though, you guys are smart like that.
The fact of the matter is, my opinions aside, Garrett was starting to feel physically affected by the things going on at work. The taxing nature of his job and his anxiety about the future was getting to him in a way that really scared me. I began to understand first hand, how there are people out there who have heart attacks from stress -- and there was absolutely nothing about this particular job that was worth that type of personal sacrifice. His health was not worth a silly paycheck. But when we started talking seriously about making a decision that would potentially render him jobless, the big-time soul searching began, because a man without a job in this country (in this economy especially) is a really tough place to be.
So we started asking some questions:
What if Garrett quit his job?
What if we had to live on less money?
What if he had time to pursue something that he was more passionate about?
What would that mean for the quality of our life?
And the answers to those questions really revealed a great disparity between the two of us at first. I value pursuit of my passions almost above anything else. I live in the moment a lot. I think about what I enjoy. What makes me feel invigorated is my compass. Sure I think about what I want to accomplish but I also ask myself often - What makes me inspired? And when it came to Garrett, he was just not on that same page. He was always on this (very difficult) quest to be "Successful", which was a thought that wasn't fully defined in his mind just yet, but he knew he wasn't there. And all of our conversations really led to me to think the generalized blanket statement that I'm about to say and that is: I'm not sure we raise and encourage the men in our society to really be in touch with their passions. And I really think that is A TRAGEDY.
Garrett graduated college with honors, got a degree in a "respectable subject" (Economics), and planned to get out in the career world and get a decent job, to be able to provide for the family he hoped to have one day. I mean that was really as far as he thought it through. That was the kind of successful male archetype that he had come to value -- and I don't really blame him. But it has taken almost 5 years of these types of negative career experiences for him to realize that his own value is not defined by his job or his paycheck. His value is defined by the person he is when he wakes up in the morning, the person he chooses to be when he has a friend in need, the person he chooses to be in each and every moment of his day.
But this is like an Epiphany of Epic Proportions to him at age 28.
(As an aside -- I'm so glad he realized this at age 28 and not age 48!!!!)
So today Garrett decided that he wanted to choose his sanity over a paycheck. He chose to prioritize figuring out what makes him tick, to discover some of his passions, to figure out what it is that he really wants, not what he thinks he is supposed to want. We are lucky enough to not have a mortgage, to not have children yet. We are lucky right now in this awful economy to have the luxury of being flexible, and today Garrett chose to harness that into a turning point that I am convinced is going to change his life. Re-evaluating what is really important to him. Dreaming big about his future. And most importantly, prioritizing his Very Best Life. After months of thinking about it, I know for him that this decision was one of the toughest he has ever made. There will be questions from friends and family. There will be raised eyebrows for people who may have chosen a different path. There will be scary times and times of doubt in our future, I am sure. But it is that important.
It reminds me of a term paper I had to write in high school about Joseph Campbell and The Hero Journey. I hated that paper and it subsequently ruined the Star Wars trilogy for me forever, I think. But the one thing that has totally redeemed Joseph Campbell for me after all these years is this quote: "We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us." And I'm so glad that today Garrett let go of that life that he had planned. For what it's worth -- even though I am going to miss our silly conversations while getting ready in the morning, his Rihanna impersonations during our commute, and the fact that the office feels a little bit emptier this afternoon -- I'm absolutely dying to meet the life that is waiting for us, whatever that may be.
Today I wrote a check to the State of California. Joy.
*I sure hope they spend it well but I'm not going to hold my breath. grumblegrumblegrumble
Today is the one year anniversary of Garrett and me shacking up.
*I know what you are thinking -- Tax Day?Really? Obvs, we know how to infuse the romance up in here -- we're bringing tax day sexy back. Justin Timberlake told me so.
And also Today -- Garrett quit his job.
*Eek! Typing that was exhilarating and scary all at the same time.
It's a new chapter, folks.
I mentioned back in September that Garrett would be losing his job sometime in the near future. His department was being centralized to our company's Denver office and his job was going with it. Things changed rapidly in those next few months and all of a sudden the job he signed up for was looking very different from the job he was doing 5 days per week. Honestly, I want to tell you all the emotions I have about what happened with this job and what I think about the direction his department is going (trust me I could write a novel), but you will have to forgive me for staying mum because as you may or may not remember, Garrett and I (up until today) worked for the same company. You can probably read between the lines though, you guys are smart like that.
The fact of the matter is, my opinions aside, Garrett was starting to feel physically affected by the things going on at work. The taxing nature of his job and his anxiety about the future was getting to him in a way that really scared me. I began to understand first hand, how there are people out there who have heart attacks from stress -- and there was absolutely nothing about this particular job that was worth that type of personal sacrifice. His health was not worth a silly paycheck. But when we started talking seriously about making a decision that would potentially render him jobless, the big-time soul searching began, because a man without a job in this country (in this economy especially) is a really tough place to be.
So we started asking some questions:
What if Garrett quit his job?
What if we had to live on less money?
What if he had time to pursue something that he was more passionate about?
What would that mean for the quality of our life?
And the answers to those questions really revealed a great disparity between the two of us at first. I value pursuit of my passions almost above anything else. I live in the moment a lot. I think about what I enjoy. What makes me feel invigorated is my compass. Sure I think about what I want to accomplish but I also ask myself often - What makes me inspired? And when it came to Garrett, he was just not on that same page. He was always on this (very difficult) quest to be "Successful", which was a thought that wasn't fully defined in his mind just yet, but he knew he wasn't there. And all of our conversations really led to me to think the generalized blanket statement that I'm about to say and that is: I'm not sure we raise and encourage the men in our society to really be in touch with their passions. And I really think that is A TRAGEDY.
Garrett graduated college with honors, got a degree in a "respectable subject" (Economics), and planned to get out in the career world and get a decent job, to be able to provide for the family he hoped to have one day. I mean that was really as far as he thought it through. That was the kind of successful male archetype that he had come to value -- and I don't really blame him. But it has taken almost 5 years of these types of negative career experiences for him to realize that his own value is not defined by his job or his paycheck. His value is defined by the person he is when he wakes up in the morning, the person he chooses to be when he has a friend in need, the person he chooses to be in each and every moment of his day.
But this is like an Epiphany of Epic Proportions to him at age 28.
(As an aside -- I'm so glad he realized this at age 28 and not age 48!!!!)
So today Garrett decided that he wanted to choose his sanity over a paycheck. He chose to prioritize figuring out what makes him tick, to discover some of his passions, to figure out what it is that he really wants, not what he thinks he is supposed to want. We are lucky enough to not have a mortgage, to not have children yet. We are lucky right now in this awful economy to have the luxury of being flexible, and today Garrett chose to harness that into a turning point that I am convinced is going to change his life. Re-evaluating what is really important to him. Dreaming big about his future. And most importantly, prioritizing his Very Best Life. After months of thinking about it, I know for him that this decision was one of the toughest he has ever made. There will be questions from friends and family. There will be raised eyebrows for people who may have chosen a different path. There will be scary times and times of doubt in our future, I am sure. But it is that important.
It reminds me of a term paper I had to write in high school about Joseph Campbell and The Hero Journey. I hated that paper and it subsequently ruined the Star Wars trilogy for me forever, I think. But the one thing that has totally redeemed Joseph Campbell for me after all these years is this quote: "We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us." And I'm so glad that today Garrett let go of that life that he had planned. For what it's worth -- even though I am going to miss our silly conversations while getting ready in the morning, his Rihanna impersonations during our commute, and the fact that the office feels a little bit emptier this afternoon -- I'm absolutely dying to meet the life that is waiting for us, whatever that may be.
April 13, 2010
Phoning It In For The Sake Of My Laundry
So tonight I could sit down and blog, or I could get my laundry done, and return some long overdue emails, and pack like an adult since we will be on a plane in slightly more than two days (and in this rainy weather I swear that's how long it is going to take my jeans to air dry so I better get to washing unless I want to resort to the dryer and look like a flood warning is in full effect the entire time I'm in Seattle.)
Anyway, since I obviously have like 900 things to do before this trip -- which technically is a trip for Garrett's Birthday (even though his actual birthday is not until May) -- I thought I would post a few snapshots of the first birthday trip we ever took together up to Humboldt County way back when we were just babies in love. I think I may have washed my face and brushed my teeth first thing every morning on that trip. Ok, I probably wasn't that crazy, but when I look at these pictures I just remember how excitedly new everything felt!
We spent a day driving up the coast, checked in to the World's Cutest Cabin and then spent a few days eating crazy-hot hot wings, drinking Lost Coast brew (if you see their Tangerine Wheat beer -- drink it immediately!), and meandering up and down North Coast beaches hand in hand being super sappy. Did you just barf a little? I know, that was pretty sickening, but it was quite blissful actually. And I have the same hopes for this birthday vacation!
Created with flickr slideshow.
Anyway, since I obviously have like 900 things to do before this trip -- which technically is a trip for Garrett's Birthday (even though his actual birthday is not until May) -- I thought I would post a few snapshots of the first birthday trip we ever took together up to Humboldt County way back when we were just babies in love. I think I may have washed my face and brushed my teeth first thing every morning on that trip. Ok, I probably wasn't that crazy, but when I look at these pictures I just remember how excitedly new everything felt!
We spent a day driving up the coast, checked in to the World's Cutest Cabin and then spent a few days eating crazy-hot hot wings, drinking Lost Coast brew (if you see their Tangerine Wheat beer -- drink it immediately!), and meandering up and down North Coast beaches hand in hand being super sappy. Did you just barf a little? I know, that was pretty sickening, but it was quite blissful actually. And I have the same hopes for this birthday vacation!
April 12, 2010
Passion Pit, Peroxide Yarmulkes, and Pictures
Is it just me or have any of you all looked at your calendar lately and said to yourself "Where the hell has April gone?" My god, I looked at my calendar last night wondering about the next time I would have a moment of down time all to myself and had to actually flip it to the month of May. Sigh...Weren't we just talking about New Year's Resolutions?
This isn't a bad thing though, I swear. In fact even though this week is going to fly by, it is full of Super! Fun! Things! Including a Wednesday night show in Davis to see Passion Pit (yay!) and then on Friday, we are Seattle Bound! I may even end up doing laundry somewhere in there too otherwise Seattle better get ready to see my in my wrinkled best. I figure this will be acceptable though because if people look at me funny I will just say I'm making a pilgramage to the capital of grunge! Although this time around I will wear much less plaid than I did in the 90s. And of course I'll be sure to make sure my lipstick doesn't make me look like I've been sucking on a tailpipe. You've got to draw the line somewhere you know.
And among all of the touristy things I plan to do I assure you that I most certainly do plan to fight fellow tourists at Kerry Park for pictures of that view. Hell, I may even wear a fanny pack and a camera around my neck while I'm at it -- what of it?
(Excuse me while I take a minute to stop laughing my ass off because I am having a gay old time visualizing myself in an awful plaid shirt, wrinkly jeans, and Dr. Martens, while I also strap on a fanny pack and sling a camera around my neck. This trip is going to be awesome! Maybe I will just do some laundry. There's a thought. )
Anyway -- digression, apparently is my middle name! So we will be there for a long weekend and I have made a spreadsheet of all the places I want to go because I am a giant nerd like that and have come to realize that instead of 4 days, we need about 40. People, there are 47 restaurants on my list. FORTY SEVEN. Not sure how to reconcile that just yet, but I can tell you this much -- I told Garrett he needs to pack layers and his appetite! The weather looks to be pretty nice and of course we will get to visit some fabulous people, so I basically can't wait for that! GOD I CAN'T WAIT FOR THAT.
The only downer is that I anticipate taking about 970 billion pictures, and I sort of hate my haircut right now. I wish I could say my hairdresser is to blame, but actually she is the most adorable thing on the planet and gave the exact cut that I asked for -- I just um...well...don't love it. So yeah there's that. But I keep trying to remind myself that this haircut is not that bad. After all it is nothing like the time I went to see my old hairdresser in Los Angeles for a cut and I walked out with a peroxide yarmulke. A YARMULKE OF PEROXIDE....let that sink in for a minute. My lesson after that incident was if a hairdresser ever says that you should go a little bit "avante garde" turn and run the other direction.
So yeah, this hair is not that bad. It's short and has bangs. Big whoop, there is no peroxide and no yarmulke, so I will live. But it probably means that I will take plenty of pictures of the adorable looking patio that we will have outside of the condo that we are staying in instead of me! Whatever. We'll see what happens. I mean if all else fails and I run out things to photograph, I will just start taking pictures of meals we eat because you know there will be no shortage of opportunities there.
This isn't a bad thing though, I swear. In fact even though this week is going to fly by, it is full of Super! Fun! Things! Including a Wednesday night show in Davis to see Passion Pit (yay!) and then on Friday, we are Seattle Bound! I may even end up doing laundry somewhere in there too otherwise Seattle better get ready to see my in my wrinkled best. I figure this will be acceptable though because if people look at me funny I will just say I'm making a pilgramage to the capital of grunge! Although this time around I will wear much less plaid than I did in the 90s. And of course I'll be sure to make sure my lipstick doesn't make me look like I've been sucking on a tailpipe. You've got to draw the line somewhere you know.
And among all of the touristy things I plan to do I assure you that I most certainly do plan to fight fellow tourists at Kerry Park for pictures of that view. Hell, I may even wear a fanny pack and a camera around my neck while I'm at it -- what of it?
(Excuse me while I take a minute to stop laughing my ass off because I am having a gay old time visualizing myself in an awful plaid shirt, wrinkly jeans, and Dr. Martens, while I also strap on a fanny pack and sling a camera around my neck. This trip is going to be awesome! Maybe I will just do some laundry. There's a thought. )
Anyway -- digression, apparently is my middle name! So we will be there for a long weekend and I have made a spreadsheet of all the places I want to go because I am a giant nerd like that and have come to realize that instead of 4 days, we need about 40. People, there are 47 restaurants on my list. FORTY SEVEN. Not sure how to reconcile that just yet, but I can tell you this much -- I told Garrett he needs to pack layers and his appetite! The weather looks to be pretty nice and of course we will get to visit some fabulous people, so I basically can't wait for that! GOD I CAN'T WAIT FOR THAT.
The only downer is that I anticipate taking about 970 billion pictures, and I sort of hate my haircut right now. I wish I could say my hairdresser is to blame, but actually she is the most adorable thing on the planet and gave the exact cut that I asked for -- I just um...well...don't love it. So yeah there's that. But I keep trying to remind myself that this haircut is not that bad. After all it is nothing like the time I went to see my old hairdresser in Los Angeles for a cut and I walked out with a peroxide yarmulke. A YARMULKE OF PEROXIDE....let that sink in for a minute. My lesson after that incident was if a hairdresser ever says that you should go a little bit "avante garde" turn and run the other direction.
So yeah, this hair is not that bad. It's short and has bangs. Big whoop, there is no peroxide and no yarmulke, so I will live. But it probably means that I will take plenty of pictures of the adorable looking patio that we will have outside of the condo that we are staying in instead of me! Whatever. We'll see what happens. I mean if all else fails and I run out things to photograph, I will just start taking pictures of meals we eat because you know there will be no shortage of opportunities there.
April 08, 2010
Life To Do List
via
I want to live a juicy life that is full of love.
I want to feel connected to those around me in a way that is authentic.
I want to acquire information and not things.
I want to work hard, but not just for the money.
I want to choose how I spend my time wisely.
I want to live with intention.
I want to feel confident in the way I express myself.
I want to embrace frugality.
I want to be kind.
I want to feel passion from the moment I wake up in the morning until the moment my head hits the pillow at night.
I want to be held.
I want to feel full of dreams.
I want to feel open to the opportunities the universe presents.
I want to consistently choose happiness.
April 06, 2010
Tuesday is the hardest day...
Tuesday is the hardest day of the week, I'm convinced.
Monday -- while definitely a shock to the system after a long weekend has an element of renewal to it. It's a new week! And I find the entire week full of possibilities to be a little exciting. Granted sometimes I find that exciting through squinty tired eyes, but it's still exciting!
Wednesday -- yes, it's humpday, and I know people argue that this is the hardest day, but to me this is like hitting the summit -- you are halfway there! Celebrate! So I don't find Wednesday unmanagable...besides, Wednesday has it's perks. Dude, I know that is hella old but it still makes me laugh.
Thursday -- I have two words for you: Baby Friday. Sure Thursday can be a slog, but you are so close to Friday you can taste it. The anticipation is insane, the weekend is so close!
And Friday -- if you don't love the release of Friday, I think you may be a robot. Friday is the gateway to the weekend, and although I am more inclined these days to go home and unwind with a glass of wine on my couch rather than heading out to get EXTREME, I still love a good Friday night and it is the absolute highlight of my week.
Saturday -- Bliss.
Sunday -- Errands and more Bliss.
So what the hell does Tuesday have going for it? Nothing, I tell you! Nothing!
And now, in case you need something to laugh about today too because it's a long ass Tuesday with no light at the end of the tunnel I give you this: (apropos of absolutely nothing)
Happy Tuesday Peeps!
Monday -- while definitely a shock to the system after a long weekend has an element of renewal to it. It's a new week! And I find the entire week full of possibilities to be a little exciting. Granted sometimes I find that exciting through squinty tired eyes, but it's still exciting!
Wednesday -- yes, it's humpday, and I know people argue that this is the hardest day, but to me this is like hitting the summit -- you are halfway there! Celebrate! So I don't find Wednesday unmanagable...besides, Wednesday has it's perks. Dude, I know that is hella old but it still makes me laugh.
Thursday -- I have two words for you: Baby Friday. Sure Thursday can be a slog, but you are so close to Friday you can taste it. The anticipation is insane, the weekend is so close!
And Friday -- if you don't love the release of Friday, I think you may be a robot. Friday is the gateway to the weekend, and although I am more inclined these days to go home and unwind with a glass of wine on my couch rather than heading out to get EXTREME, I still love a good Friday night and it is the absolute highlight of my week.
Saturday -- Bliss.
Sunday -- Errands and more Bliss.
So what the hell does Tuesday have going for it? Nothing, I tell you! Nothing!
And now, in case you need something to laugh about today too because it's a long ass Tuesday with no light at the end of the tunnel I give you this: (apropos of absolutely nothing)
Happy Tuesday Peeps!
April 05, 2010
Coffee Is My Religion
Well that was a quick Easter weekend, wasn't it?
I don't have any stories of bunnies or baskets (well maybe I do have one story about a basket) but I did have a fabulous time! We headed up to Chico to visit my aunts and cousins and if there is one thing you should know about my family, it is that we always have a great time together. Although I was raised going to church, as an adult I am not very religious. Our family holidays almost always end up as religious events though, because boy do we get a little ceremonious (even holy) about our food!
For Easter this means Eggs Benedict.
And you can bet every member of my family, no matter where they were celebrating this year was either eating it or thinking about it. I'd show you a photo, except that is how quickly the bennys went -- I didn't even time to snap a single shot before all the deliciousness was gone! This year was the first year I actually made the eggs benedict instead of sitting at the table salivating and waiting for it to be served and it was kind of great! It sort of felt like a rite of passage -- we used my grandma's recipe for hollandaise sauce and I poached my first eggs EVER, and I'm surprised that it all turned out pretty great. (I'm sure it had to do with my mad kitchen dancing skillz, yo!) But it made me think -- what other seemingly difficult recipes I have avoided making just because I thought for sure I'd screw them up? I'm actually kind of inspired to get in the kitchen!
After breakfast we went over to my aunts' warehouse (they own a coffee distribution and service company) and seriously, Garrett and I were like kids in a candy store! (In case you have forgotten, we met working at Peet's Coffee & Tea, so we are coffee ENTHUSIASTS!) We played with the espresso machines, sampled the chocolate, the syrups, the espresso, and the chai -- and I think Garrett rekindled his love for making espresso drinks.
Of course every time Garrett or Amy made a drink we would all have to sample the yumminess, so by the end of the day we were all feeling pretty amped, if you know what I mean. Amy told us all about her recent coffee buying trip down to Nicaragua, and we were all ears!
All in all it was a super fun outing and so nice to spend time with family. I'm trying to be really conscious lately of how lucky I am that I have family living close by, because who knows, it may not always be like that. It's fun to get away for the day, have some laughs, and be home in time for some trashy reality tv and some quality time with my current book in bed!
But let me assure you, I am already ready for another weekend!
Hope you had a wonderful weekend wherever you were and whatever you ate!
April 02, 2010
Today I Am Grateful
Today I am grateful to break my silence.
Because even though I've been at a loss for words, my heart and head have been full of them.
Today I am grateful that I have a partner in life.
A partner in crime if I'm being honest, and sometimes in life you just need an accomplice.
Today I am grateful that I have a choice.
Even if it sometimes it feels overwhelming to be at a crossroads.
Today I am grateful for a wonderful, fun, and supportive family.
Although we are scattered all over the state, the way we communicate always brings a smile to my face.
Today I am grateful for friends who appreciate my particular brand of crazy.
Even when I don't see them enough, their thoughts and notes lift me up when I feel down.
Today I am grateful for my health and my body's abilities.
My lack of kickboxing skill reminds me that I'm lucky just to be healthy enough to go to the gym.
Today I am grateful that it is Friday.
Because empirical testing has proved that a weekend can cure almost anything.
March 25, 2010
Clear As Mud
Last night I felt beat up after a long day and when I pulled in the driveway there was a cat in my front yard that proceeded to stare me down and give me the evil eye the entire time it was taking a giant dump on my lawn. It then got up and walked away as it wagged its victorious tail at me and I laughed thinking that it was just such a fitting metaphor for how I felt. A bit of The Anxiety has been creeping into my life lately. I have had some confusing things to think about and impending big decisions that will ultimately need to me made, and yes I know I’m being Vaguey McVaguerson at this point, but trust me when I tell you that the specifics don’t really matter. What matters is how do you know when you are making The Right Decision?
That’s kind of a stupid question I realize, because I firmly subscribe to the philosophy that there is no Right or Wrong - but I’m still stewing on it. Actually Amber tweeted something the other day that pretty much summed up my feeling about the illusion that is "right and wrong" or "good and bad", for that matter.
Behold! Twitter wisdom:
I find this so true when you think about it! Everything is relative. Hell, just call me Einstein. Something that was devastating and awful at one point in life may later be fruitful in a way that you never imagined. The universe has a funny way of working in that manner I’ve learned, so I generally try to make difficult times a springboard for growth and appreciate that I may not have ever encountered that opportunity had the difficult time never come about. And while I really do feel like things always end up working out in the end if you have the right attitude (whether it happened the way I wanted it to, or the way I thought it should) I still struggle A LOT what the hell to do in the meantime? What do you do when that anxiety creeps in and you feel like you are standing at a fork in the road? You know things will work out no matter what path you choose because you are capable and can make the best of any situations, but you are still not exactly sure which road to take. That, is a confusing moment.
Henry David Thoreau is always quoted as saying “Go confidently in the direction of your dreams,” and there are times in life when this is so black and white that I have no problem putting my confident face on and getting moving. But it is those times when I’m not sure if it’s my own dreams that I am chasing or the dreams other people have for me. How does one know that they are in possession of a dream that should be pursued with confidence? Where is the instruction manual? I have tried to google it to no avail! Because the problem is sometimes I dream of living on an artists’ commune, sometimes I dream of having 5 children and home-schooling all of them, sometimes I dream of having a corner office, sometimes I dream of travelling the world alone and speaking only to strangers, and sometimes I dream of taking a really long nap. Which dream is the right dream? I know having clarity makes all decisions easier, but how does one get clarity?
How do you make difficult decisions?
That’s kind of a stupid question I realize, because I firmly subscribe to the philosophy that there is no Right or Wrong - but I’m still stewing on it. Actually Amber tweeted something the other day that pretty much summed up my feeling about the illusion that is "right and wrong" or "good and bad", for that matter.
Behold! Twitter wisdom:
I find this so true when you think about it! Everything is relative. Hell, just call me Einstein. Something that was devastating and awful at one point in life may later be fruitful in a way that you never imagined. The universe has a funny way of working in that manner I’ve learned, so I generally try to make difficult times a springboard for growth and appreciate that I may not have ever encountered that opportunity had the difficult time never come about. And while I really do feel like things always end up working out in the end if you have the right attitude (whether it happened the way I wanted it to, or the way I thought it should) I still struggle A LOT what the hell to do in the meantime? What do you do when that anxiety creeps in and you feel like you are standing at a fork in the road? You know things will work out no matter what path you choose because you are capable and can make the best of any situations, but you are still not exactly sure which road to take. That, is a confusing moment.
Henry David Thoreau is always quoted as saying “Go confidently in the direction of your dreams,” and there are times in life when this is so black and white that I have no problem putting my confident face on and getting moving. But it is those times when I’m not sure if it’s my own dreams that I am chasing or the dreams other people have for me. How does one know that they are in possession of a dream that should be pursued with confidence? Where is the instruction manual? I have tried to google it to no avail! Because the problem is sometimes I dream of living on an artists’ commune, sometimes I dream of having 5 children and home-schooling all of them, sometimes I dream of having a corner office, sometimes I dream of travelling the world alone and speaking only to strangers, and sometimes I dream of taking a really long nap. Which dream is the right dream? I know having clarity makes all decisions easier, but how does one get clarity?
How do you make difficult decisions?
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